A rainbow of poisonous colors!

We at our house have been fighting over this book lately. It's painfully applicable.

Poisonous words corrupt our whole person, says James. We are left demoralized, weakened, compromised, defeated, and jaundiced. All is yellow to the jaundiced eye. We are angry with the world. Our loved ones. Our friends. Our neighbors. Ourselves. The Dove—the Holy Spirit—lifts from us and flies away, leaving us to ourselves. We become unteachable. Defensive. Irritable. Full of unkindness. When we speak in that condition, nothing comes out right.

There's not much on that list that hasn't described me perfectly lately...or for the past year or so. I've been using the word "jaded", but "jaundiced" works just as well. One is green and one is yellow. Throw in red for anger, and black for the cloud above my head. It's a rainbow of fruity flavors of fun being human, weak, and not able not to sin.

But reading on, the glimmer of light in the gloom:

But there's hope...as long as you can feel truly remorseful and repentant, there is hope. The proof that we are no in a terminal-chastening mode is that we are given sorrow for sin. God grants unfeigned repentance. We confess it to him. When we do so, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (I John 1:9)
Not only are we granted the ability to repent, but we are also changed from glory to glory by the Holy Spirit (2 Cor 3:18)... Repentance shows that we are still being changed. Despite our stupidity and folly, God stoops to our weakness to give us help. It shows He is not finished with us. If the word of God convicts us, it means we are not stone deaf to the Spirit but are indeed hearing His voice.

O Lord, be merciful to me, a sinner....